Triple play of duds this week. Let's get this over with,
The Aristocats - This is the 1st movie produced totally after Walt Disney's death (he died during Jungle Book) and it looks like they went out of their way to prove he was the heart and soul of the company. This movie has no heart, no plot, and almost no characters. Rich cats being kidnapped and slowly walking home with no real danger along the way does not make for a thrilling movie. In fact, I'd rather watch paint dry. The kittens have a few cute moments, but that's it. It feels like I put more effort into this paragraph than they did in the whole story.
2/10
Treasure Planet - This is actually a pretty cool adaptation of Treasure Island done all steam-punky and sci-fi. There is a ton of impressive animation in the artwork and design of this movie, and the characters are pretty well defined. Joseph Gordon Levitt does a nice job as Jim Hawkins, and David Hyde Pierce is his usual charmingly neurotic self. Emma Thompson does a great job as the space captain. Unfortunately, right when the movie is revving up for the 3rd act, you are subjected to Martin Short as a marooned robot. Think C-3PO meets Jar Jar Binks and you'll have an idea of how truly awful he is. It's almost a total movie killer. Fortunately the adventure is engrossing enough that you can sort of grit your teeth and get through it. The Heart of this movie is really with Long John Silver, as any decent adaptation should be. Here he looks like Jabba the Hutt, a borg, and your grandfather had a baby. The end result is a very unsettling looking dude, who is also quite charming. Despite his terrifying cyborg arm and eye, the animators and Actor Brian Murray give him enough weakness that you can't help but feel for the guy. Regardless of his high-tech prosthesis, he is a crippled and lonely man, desperate to find the treasure that will bring meaning to his life of piracy. It's not a glamorous portrayal, and his evil side certainly comes out, but in the end, his new found friendship with Jim wins out. It's a softer take on the character, but I think it's much more fascinating than a truly evil Silver would have been. He's like a much older Jack Sparrow in many ways. But still, Martin Short is in this movie, and the film suffers most when it goes for a slapstick humor that feels forced.
6.5/10
Atlantis: The Lost Empire
This movie could almost be called "Treasure Planet, Version 1.0" You have a protagonist who doesn't fit in and dreams of making a great discovery, an academic acquaintance funds his expedition and unwittingly hires the bad guys as part of the crew, then all the excess characters are unceremoniously killed off, and no one gets the full treasure. The problem with Atlantis is, there is no emotional core to this movie. Milo, played by Michael J. Fox, is way too boring to ultimately care about. He's basically James Spader's character from Stargate, all wide-eyed gee-whiz genius and no life experience. Unfortunately, there's no Kurt Russel here to bring a sense of reality. Leonard Nimoy is woefully underused, and James Garner is Stephan Lang from Avatar without the knife-wielding battle mech. For all the flashy animation, this movie is quite hallow and ultimately dull. On a truly Nerdy note, the young female mechanic in the movie reminded me an awful lot of Kaylee from Firefly. Guess why? Joss Whedon is listed as one of the screen writers for this movie! It's basically a prototype for the character Kaylee would become. And that's the best thing about this movie. That it probably helped inspire something much, much better. Also, James Garner turns into a Crystal Monster and is shredded by a propeller, so that's kinda neat.
4/10
On a side note, although I've certainly had my share of disappointments with this project, Disney studios never have anything less that brilliant animation. Even when the stories are bad, they're all at least lovely to look at.
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